How Do We End Female Rivalry? It All Begins with Working on Ourselves

Tania Cicmil

Competing against others and comparing yourself to them is for amateurs. Master being the best version of you. Do your best, be your best and give your best. Love, grow and contribute - Tania Cicmil

Competition is something that has existed throughout human history. Thousands of years ago it was out of a need to survive and find a mate, while today it's largely focused towards organized sports and the like. Just as healthy competition exists, so too does unhealthy competition. Unhealthy competition is born out of both fear and scarcity and largely assumes that there is only a limited amount of success or achievement available. This is especially true within the female space.

Whilst there are many women who readily support other women, this action is often limited by a subconscious condition that the women they support are not more successful than they are, especially if they are within the same industry. Rather than choosing to support their sisters out of abundance, a need to compete with them arises, born out of the aforementioned scarcity mindset.

It's time to break this cycle of unnecessary female rivalry. It's time for women to begin using their power not to keep other women down, but raise them up, particularly within the entrepreneurial space. No matter where in the world they are located, women have learnt to judge, gossip, and make nasty remarks about one another, all in order to compete with each other.

But why is this need to compete with other women there? And why are we allowing it to permeate into the business space? In trying to find ways to deem other women wrong, or less than, so we can show the world we are right and have a higher value, we should instead be using our biggest asset – the bond of womanhood.

Breaking this vicious cycle all starts with ourselves. Doing the inner work to see our true value, so that we may, in turn, see the true value of others surrounding us. Personal development coach and founder of Mindstate Coaching, Tania Cicmil, outlines below the four phases of adopting a richer mindset towards ourselves and others.

1. Designing Phase

During this first phase, it's important to spend some time designing what your ideal life looks like. And by 'some time' I mean ideally a few weeks. The reason for this is to gain more than a surface level view of what you would like your life to be like. To have clear visualisation, you need to examine all facets of the current life you are living in detail. From there you will be able to clearly see if there are any changes you need to make.

2. Execution Phase

Here you should spend another few weeks creating a detailed step-by-step plan on how to work your way to your dream life, and begin following these steps.

3. Transformation Phase

Here is where the real work begins. You will start experiencing shifts in the way you currently think and begin to see the ways you need to re-order your thinking to be able to start living your dream life. This will be the most profound transformation you will ever experience. Embrace this feeling. Embrace the change to your belief system and the habits you will begin to adopt.

4. Accountability phase

To keep living your dream life, you need to remain accountable. One of the best ways to do this is journaling or documenting your week. To be really consistent with keeping yourself accountable, find yourself a support network. This could be a trusted friend or relative, a support group or community on Facebook. Keeping yourself accountable to positive change is key and I cannot stress this enough.

If you would like to learn more from Tania, follow her on Instagram, for your daily dose of inspiration and advice. If you are ready to take the next step, and would like to work with Tania on your transformational journey, you can check out here The Rich Mother Mindset program, which is designed around the four phases above.